Tag Archives: cristal ryder

Winners

Well, well, we made it through Monday mostly unscathed. At least I think we did. I so overslept today and I did it in an awkward position which means I’m limping since my hip hurts like the Dickens. And if you’ve ever read Dickens, you’ll understand why it hurts. No offense to you Dickens lovers…but really? Ouch.

As most of y’all know, we had a big blog hop going on. Yup, the Big Cocks & Broomsticks Blog Hop to celebrate Halloween, the Cabal of Hotness and just being goofy. We chose our winners and they’ve been mailed. Now to wait  for their responses which will probably be “Yippee skippy!” or something like that.

The Grand Prize ($100 gc to Amazon or Barnes & Noble) goes to Val Denis.

Second place ($50 gc to Amazon or B&N) goes to Joey Ross.

Third place ($25 gc to Amazon or B&N) goes to Shelley Monro.

First off, we had so much fun with this hop and it’s always a pleasure to meet so many new people! Really it is. Secondly, I hope most of everyone sticks around because with the Cabal of Hotness, there’s no telling what we’ll come up with next. Honestly, I don’t even know what we’re doing next…mostly because those bitches are crazy. Y’all hear?

Oh! And I had a giveaway here on my blog as well. Random.org chose…

Jasmyn Novachek as the winner of the Danica Avet fleece blanket! Yay!

So glad everyone participated in the giveaway and if you’re looking for more goodies to win, be sure to “like” me on Facebook. I hold monthly giveaways known as Fan Appreciation Giveaways. This month I’m giving away gift cards to help with holiday shopping.

Oh and in case I haven’t mentioned it, I’m also holding a giveaway here on the blog when I hit my 1,000 blog post! I have prizes from a large group of writers who are most awesome. Among a few,  you can expect to win books from Cynthia Eden, Lea Barrymire, A.M. Griffin, Lucy Felthouse, Cara Carnes, Cassandra Carr, Cristal Ryder, Amy Ruttan, Anya Richards, Denise Tompkins, Kari Gregg, um…Sky Robinson, Piper Trace, swag and prizes from Jillian Chantal, Tara Nina and gosh, there are even more authors who I’m sorry to say I forget at the moment. Needless to say it’s a cornucopia of romance! Yay! So look for that giveaway to happen…um, next week most likely. I’ll start the actual countdown to the 1,000 blog post tomorrow.

Peace out!

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The Hilarity Continues

Just a quick note to announce that today the Cabal of Hotness received its covers for the next three volumes of the Fondled and Gobbled anthologies.

Nope, you didn’t read that wrong! We have three more volumes coming out with four gut busting stories in each. We’ve even added three more authors to the anthologies, bringing in Kinky Hotness Cara Carnes, Shy Hotness Sky Robinson and Big Daddy Hotness himself, Justin Whitfield!

First up is Fondled and Gobbled: Back for More with funny women, Lea Barrymire, Cara Carnes, Cassandra Carr, and A.M. Griffin:

fandgbackformore_msr

Next up is Fondle and Gobbled: One More Slurp featuring stories by me, Sasha Devlin, Anya Richards and Sky Robinson:

fandgonemoreslurp_msr

And last, but not least is Fondled and Gobbled: Messier Than Ever with stories by Amy Ruttan, Cristal Ryder, Piper Trace and Justin Whitfield:fandgmessierthanever_msr

There’s a licking theme going on…or would that be a tongue theme? Heh. Either way the covers really reflect the humor of the stories as well as the eroticism because despite them being funny, they’re hawt! Kind of like us!

Before you leave, don’t forget there are three giveaways going on right now. The What is Danica thinking? giveaway ends tonight. The Big Cocks and Shamrocks Blog Hop ends on Sunday and my Scavenger Hunt for Dean’s List ends next week. Be sure to get your chances to win swag, books and naughty stuff. Everyone loves naughty stuff, don’t they?

Oh! And in case I forget, tomorrow I have another interview…rar, one I think everyone will definitely appreciate. *waggles her eyebrows*

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Fondled and Gobbled: Is Your Jaw Tired Yet?

So sorry, I couldn’t resist that title. *ponders getting the Cabal to agree to adding that to our long list of anthology titles*

It’s been a week since the Cabal officially began to fondle and gobble the masses and they’ve spoken:
Terri with Night Owl Reviews gave Fondled and Gobbled: Someone Had To Do It 4.5/5.0 stars “Five fantastic authors have taken scenes and made them spoofs.  This twist on current romance may have you laughing hysterically.  Each story is totally unique and has it’s own unique twist but all end with a happy ending though some are somewhat strange.  No matter what type of romance you like, read this one.” 

Nikki with Close Encounters with the Night Kind gave Fondled and Gobbled: Someone Had To It 5/5 spiders. “All in all this was an incredibly enjoyable and entertaining read!  Even the hot parts had humor in them!  These ladies have tapped into something fresh, and I can’t wait for more!!  One taste was not enough.  I definitely can’t wait to gobble up the next one!!  Great Read!!”

And then there’s what we’re doing next. We’re some busy ladies, I tell you!
Like, today we’re over at Patricia Macia’s blog with character interviews. This is just a little peek at the insanity we brought. *cough*

Q: Please introduce yourselves and give me a two sentence synopsis of your story. 

Lucius: *looks around at all the women and lifts his chin* I’m Lucius, and I’m not sure what the fuss is all about. I just tried to have a quiet sneak-fuck and ended up trussed like a turkey, being assaulted. *gets a faraway look in his eyes* Never realized how much fun that could be…
Steele: I’m Steele Ana. I was working in a dead end job, but then Grey Christian came in and we fell instantly in love! He promptly insisted I move into his awesome penthouse in Seattle, and of course I said yes!
Missy: *tapping the screen* Can you guys hear me? Yes? Good. I’m Missy. *waving* Um, I’m on Oz’s ship someplace in the next galaxy over from the Milky Way. We’re heading to his planet, I guess. Anyway, after he took me from Earth I’m not too worried about where we’re going. He’s hunky, I was single… enough said, right?
Holly: *Pauses in the middle of flipping through Big Toys for Big O’s magazine* What’s there to talk about? I like sex. I like orgasms even more. My man, Caid Kincaid gives me what I need. Sort of. *slouches in her chair* Most of the time. *Slouches more* He’s really trying. *Glares at Lucius* Ain’t fair how some people get all the luck. *Mutters something about cock enlargement devices*
Emily: Hi! First off, thanks for having me. I’m Emily Justasalad, and I’m…well, I’m just a regular girl, so all this attention is taking me a little time to get used to. My story is really one about triumph and self-discovery–you know, learning to love yourself! Oh yeah, and I came to this realization by having an all-out, five-hot-men-on-one-Emily, Broadshaft Brothers orgy on my kitchen table. It might not work for everyone, but it was certainly therapeutic for me.
 
This is where we’ll be next week:
February 17 – NAC Blog
* Naughty Hotness
February 18 – NAC Blog
* Bootay Hotness
February 19 – Mari Carr’s Blog
February 19 – Coffee Time Romance Chat (9p.m. EST)

February 20 – NAC Blog
*Chocolate Hotness
February 21 – NAC Blog
* Honey Hotness
February 24 – NAC Blog
* Glacial Hotness
 
And on February 22, the second volume in the anthology, Fondled and Gobbled: Going Back for Seconds will be unleashed on the world! Bwahaha!
goingbackforseconds_msr

The virgin whose carefully planned hymen removal doesn’t work out the way romance novels told her it would. A busty broad doing what she can to get over her penis anxiety—assisted by a cadre of male strippers. A not-so-bright (and not so “big”) alien who comes to claim his life-mate, and the Earth girl who wants to be claimed at all costs. A cursed, mute shapeshifter who needs to pop his cherry with his unsuspecting fated mate…

If you’re looking for the perfect romance with the perfect hero and heroine—this isn’t it! This series of spoofs, parodies and just-for-fun take-offs is for longtime, hard-core romance readers able to laugh at the clichés, purple prose and “suspend your disbelief” plot devices that haunt our beloved favorite genre.

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Unleashing the Cabal

You knew it was bound to happen. One day you’d stop here and see insanity and chaos unleashed on the world.

Today is that day. With the upcoming releases of Fondled and Gobbled: Someone Had To Do It and Fondled and Gobbled: Going Back For Seconds on the horizon, we’ve scheduled stops all over the place. Seriously? For the next few weeks, we’re going to be some very busy, crazy ladies and today kicks off the start of the insanity.

I’m sure our hostess clutched her head and screamed when she saw what we sent her. But she did ask for us to be ourselves…so we were. In a chatroom in an undisclosed location…with no real moderator. If you happen to see Nikki in person, make sure she’s sane, okay?

But if you want to see what might have driven her over the edge, check out our very first interview as a group over at Ramblings from a Chaotic Mind…Come to think of it, we probably chose the perfect place to kick off the nearly three month long blog tour for the Fondled and Gobbled anthologies.

Also, don’t forget that we have our own blog. We’re introducing ourselves this morning and offering up a chance to win a $100 Amazon gift card. Stop by to find out how to win. And as if that wasn’t enough, there are some blog hops coming up in February and March. Check out the sidebar for more information.

Got it? Good. I hope to have some sexy man pictures tomorrow, but we’ll have to see if they sit still long enough for me to get them. *cackle* ahem.

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DJ Cristal in the House

Welcome back, peeps! I hope everyone had a fantastic Christmas. I ate way too much, didn’t exercise enough and didn’t get as much done as I thought I would. But then it was a holiday. You’re supposed to be lazy for holidays. Right? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Before we get to today’s awesome post by my fellow Cabal of Hotness memeber, Cristal Ryder (or Honey Hotness), I’d like to thank everyone who participated in the Pecs & Presents Blog Hop over the weekend. The winner is Joy. Be sure to keep an eye on what goes on here because I’m sure there’s more awesomeness to come!

And now I’m handing the mike over to Cristal.

I was thinking about a song that might go with a pole dance scene and then promo Plus One – it comes out on Jan 4. What about ET, by Katy Perry. I adore that song and I associate it to pole dance because I saw Steve Retchless do a rountine to ET on America’s Got Talent. Plus One has a pole dance scene in it so the two go together a little.

 

Blurb:plusone_msr(1)

A girls’ night out for a pole dance workshop at her friend’s upscale sex club takes a wild turn for normally timid Karen. She knew what to expect, but not how far she’d be willing to go.

Rob comes to Desire After Dark as a plus one. His only expectation is visual stimulation, not participation. But that soon changes when he spots the buttoned-up-to-there beauty hanging around on the sidelines.

Thrown together, Karen and Rob find the sexual heat between them undeniable. Surrounded by twosomes and moresomes, they step on an unexpected and steamy path. But when another joins in, they have a plus one of their own.

 

You can find me at:

You can find me at:

www.cristalryder.com

https://twitter.com/#!/CristalRyder

https://www.facebook.com/cristal.ryderauthor

Ellora’s Cave

All Romance ebooks

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Sybarite Seductions

Lyrical Press

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The Super Sekrit Project Reveal

If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you’ve seen references to my super sekrit projects (lately I’ve gone all James Bond on my writing). I have many of them, but one of them involves a group you may have seen me discussing: the Cabal of Hotness. We’re all erotic romance writers and share a twisted sense of humor we applied to writing in a sekrit project.

Well, here it is. One of the super sekrit projects:

someonehadtodoit_msr

 

The perfect man—with the imperfect cock and oral skills. The Dom who isn’t a dom, and the man who proves it to him. The alien with dessert-flavored semen and three cocks. The older man (a kajillionaire with a penthouse in Seattle…) who has limitless ability to come all night with his naïve little virgin. A woman on a diet who craves a feast of meat and finds herself five Broadshaft Brothers who can deliver. 

If you’re looking for the perfect romance with the perfect hero and heroine, this isn’t it! This is a series of spoofs, parodies, just-for-fun lighthearted take-offs. It’s for all us longtime, hard-core romance readers who can laugh at the clichés, purple prose and “suspend your disbelief” plot devices that haunt our beloved favorite genre. 

 

And this:

goingbackforseconds_msr

 

The virgin whose carefully planned hymen removal doesn’t work out the way all the romance novels told her it would. A busty broad doing what she can to get over her penis anxiety—assisted by a cadre of male strippers. A not-so-bright (and not so “big”) alien who comes to claim his life mate, and the Earth girl who wants to be claimed at all costs. A cursed, mute shapeshifter who needs to pop his cherry with his unsuspecting fated mate. 

If you’re looking for the perfect romance with the perfect hero and heroine, this isn’t it! This is a series of spoofs, parodies, just-for-fun lighthearted take-offs. It’s for all us longtime, hard-core romance readers who can laugh at the clichés, purple prose and “suspend your disbelief” plot devices that haunt our beloved favorite genre. 

 

We had so much fun writing these stories and we can hardly wait to share them with the world. I just don’t know if the world is ready to read them. What do you think?

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Guest Author: Cristal Ryder

I think this is almost as good as my debut release with Ellora’s Cave. What you ask? Why my first print book, that’s what! Hot Fusion was originally release in October 2011 in the Oh! Canada line. I was so thrilled for it to be re-released in paperback, along with Letting Jack Watch by Katheryn Wallis. This two book treat is called Canadian Connections.

Hot Fusion is set in a beautiful Ontario town called Niagara-on-the-Lake. I’m fortunate to live close to NOTL and visit frequently. It’s a wonderful area and where the story of Kara and Max unfold. She is a Cordon Bleu chef and he owns a vineyard. In the cooking world when you combine two types of food, like Creole and Japanese for example, it’s called fusion. In this story I combine some steamy stuff between Kara and Max creating a delicious buffet of Hot Fusion. I hope you are inspired to give it a read.

I can’t promote this cover without a shout out to Christian Boeving. He’s the cover model on Canadian Connections. I had the wonderful fortune to meet him at RomantiCon this past October. All the way around he is one yummy guy.

I know Danica will have no problem at all with me talking about Christian, since she has a…ahem…*thing* for the Cavemen in case you haven’t noticed. They seem to turn up here at Unearthly Musings quite frequently.

So feast your eyes upon the delicious Christian, subject of my crush. Le sigh. But, you’ll have to wander on through the excerpt before the reward of Christian 😉 Yes, I can play naughty too, check out some of my other books for that 😉

An Excerpt From: HOT FUSION

Copyright © CRISTAL RYDER, 2011

All Rights Reserved, Ellora’s Cave Publishing, Inc.

The afternoon slipped leisurely by and Kara enjoyed a mellow languor she hadn’t experienced in such a long time. Sure, it was the wine and the company, but this little bit of patio time in her hometown was the best medicine.

Max ordered a scrumptious antipasto plate and slid his chair around the table beside her so they could share. Their knees touched, sending little shock waves of desire along her nerve endings to settle between her thighs, keeping her arousal at a nice, pleasant hum. She didn’t move her leg and neither did he. Their connection continued to grow like a live wire sparking between them. She wondered if he was as turned-on as she. And when he glanced at her over the rim of his glass, she knew. The look in his eyes that drove her to distraction as a ripe teenage girl reflected in his gaze now. A little shiver of delight ran down her spine.

She kept glancing at him over the plate of food, unable to take her eyes off him. They had since moved to a nice Pinot Grigio rather than the ice wine and both glasses now sat empty, begging to be filled. She wondered if it was wise to order more. But she longed to continue sitting here with him, sipping wine, people watching and being enveloped in the intoxicating scent of Max and the flowers. Kara was captivated by him all over again.

He draped his arm across the back of her chair in a casual movement and her heart did a little jump when his thumb stroked her bare shoulder. The air between them fairly crackled and she decided the decision had been taken from her. She’d stay. Here, with him, and let jazzy tunes from the hidden speakers wrap them in anonymity.

“So, you liked the wine, eh?”

“Yes, it was very nice. I should do a sweets night featuring your ice wine.”

“I like that idea.”

“Good.” Kara needed to bring something important up but didn’t know how, and was afraid it would shatter the fragile ease that was developing between them. But she had to for her own peace of mine.

“Max. A-are you still marr…” He shook his head and Kara let the word trail away. Relief flooded through her and she didn’t want to press it further right now, or know the reasons he was now single. Time for that later. The fact he was no longer married was all she needed to know.

He gazed at her intently and raised his eyebrows. “Do you want to know why?”

This time Kara shook her head and wagged her finger back and forth. “Not really. At least right now. I just needed to know your, um, situation.”

He sat back and smiled. “Don’t want be the other woman, eh?”

Kara laughed and covered her mouth with her hand, a little embarrassed. “No, definitely not on my bucket list!” She also felt a little ashamed being so thrilled by the news he wasn’t married. Divorce was never easy.

The rest of the afternoon fell to mindless, comfortable banter and Kara’s contentment grew. The stress and hectic days prior began to fade away and she relaxed more as the afternoon wore on.

Kara’s mind began to wander. What would come next? How would they part? Should she ask him to come back and open another bottle of wine? Worry furrowed her brow and she jumped when his hand cupped her shoulder. His fingers traced up the column of her throat and pushed into the curls at her nape, massaging gently. The movement chased the worry from her.

“Mmm, that feels nice.” Kara smiled and faced him. She shivered in delight and he chuckled at her involuntary reaction.

“Cold?”

She shook her head and without a second thought leaned toward him. He encouraged her with a gentle pull. Their gazes stayed connected and just before their lips met, Kara’s eyelids fluttered close.

Her breath caught when he kissed her—chaste and gentle, but with an underlying power she longed to unleash. Kara craved it and kissed him back, opening her mouth to dart her tongue out and taste his. He met her with a sudden ferocity that liquefied her insides. She was helpless to him, her muscles slack and weak. If he didn’t have his arm around her, she would have dissolved into a puddle of passion at his feet.

Kara forgot where they were, all sense of place and time vanished. Her hand crept up to the back of his neck and her fingers played with his hair at the nape. Sound faded and Kara was only aware of him, nothing else. She sensed the sexual tension building in him and knew they should slow down before they embarrassed themselves in public. But she couldn’t stop and moved closer to him, needing the feel of his body next to hers.

The sharp ring and vibrating buzz of her cell phone on the metal table pierced the moment and she jolted away, almost panting. Kara couldn’t catch her breath and fumbled to grab the phone and flip it open. It was the bakery number.

“Hel—” Kara cleared the roughness from her throat and glanced at Max, who was flushed and watching her intently. His dark gaze made promises she wanted him to keep. Kara looked away to try to rebalance herself. “Uhm, hello?”

“Hi, Kara.” It was Jilly, one of her co-op students. “Hey, are you all right?”

“Uh, sure. Why?”

“You sound kinda weird.”

Weird? No, just incredibly horny. “What do you need?” she asked a little too harshly and immediately regretted it.

“Oh, anyway, the health inspector is here.”

“What? Holy shit, I completely forgot.” Kara’s passion extinguished as if a bucket of cold water had been sloshed on her. “I’ll be right there.”

Kara quickly gathered her bags and turned to Max. “I gotta go. Totally forgot an appointment.” She cupped his cheek in her palm. “Thank you, it was a great afternoon.”

She stood and ignored the curious looks from the other patrons and dashed from the patio. As she rounded the wall of flowers, she glanced over her shoulder at Max. He leaned comfortably in his seat, his arm once again draped across the back of the chair she had been sitting in. He winked and smiled at her.

Holy crap.

That one simple and utterly sexy look totally reignited her passion for him. How could she possibly concentrate on a boring old health inspector now?

~~~

….and, Christian.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ready for the whole caveman crew? I had the good fortune of posing with when I received my award for Rock-Hard Heat. The reason I look like a huge marshmallow is because I was still in my hazmat costume for the Mayan Survivor Party.

So, are ya’ll beefcaked out? I’m not. Anytime baby!

You can find me at:

www.cristalryder.com

https://twitter.com/#!/CristalRyder

https://www.facebook.com/cristal.ryderauthor

Ellora’s Cave

All Romance ebooks

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Sybarite Seductions

Lyrical Press

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