Category Archives: parents

Quick Note

No, I haven’t forgotten about the blog. Okay, that’s a lie. I do forget. Life is busy, but then that’s why it’s life, isn’t it? Otherwise, it’d probably be called something like ‘limbo’ or ‘stagnant animation’.

There have been quite a few changes since my last post. Some of them were good, some were horrible. Because I want people to understand that I’m not just an author, but also a person, I’ll give you a brief synopsis of what’s been going on since my last post in March 2015.

April 2015 – My dad passed away after a year long struggle with cancer. It happened the day before Easter, to be exact. We knew it was coming, but how can you possibly prepare for losing someone you love? You can’t. There’s always that question people ask, “Would it be easier if you had time to spend with them before they die, or would you prefer it happen fast?” Okay, maybe people don’t ask that until after the agony of loss begins to dull, but I have been asked it. And my answer is neither. They’re both terrible. I lost my stepfather unexpectedly and I lost my dad after a lingering illness. They both hurt. They both leave you with regrets.

When Dad died, I lost all interest in writing. I’m not sure what I did those first few months besides cry and sleep and hug my pets, but writing was the last thing on my mind.

September 2015 – I released the third book in my Crushes to Cravings series, Kiss Chase. And ended up getting myself put on probation with Amazon. I missed my download deadline which means my book didn’t come out when I said it would and I got a year’s probation. That means no uploading of books for pre-order. That sucked!

November 2015 – I moved into my new house. I love it, by the way. I no longer have to battle with neighbors to get onto my street or into my driveway. When I go outside at night, I see stars because we’re far from the city lights. Yes, I moved out to the country. Or swamp if you want to get technical. The Atchafalaya basin is pretty much in my backyard. To date, I’ve several raccoons, possums, armadillos, woodpeckers, eagles, snakes (of course), and deer. In my backyard. Seriously. When you wake up in the morning and stumble outside to let your dog out and a massive buck starts running away from you, for a minute there it kind of looks like they’re coming at you.

The snake… Well, I had a very close call with one of those. As in it was right behind me in the crevice of my screen door trying to get to the chair I was sitting on. I almost fell down my stairs (again). But I managed to gather my composure and be a good neighbor by using a very long stick to pick it up and move it to the yard where it took off for the ditch. No doubt it’s where hundreds of its brothers, sisters, and cousins are hanging out. As long as they stay there and away from me, I won’t have to get physical with them.

December 2015 – I released the second book in my Reindeer Games series, Blitzen’s Savior. That was fun. Christmas was fun. My godson and his wife came home from Florida and announced they were expecting their first child. I cried. Yeah, yeah, I’m a big baby when it comes to my godson. What can I say? He’s my baby and his having a child is like me getting my first grandchild.

January 2016 – My full-time day job duties changed. I won’t go into it, but I’ve taken on more responsibilities. Sort of like Peter Parker and that whole ‘with great power comes great responsibility’ thing, I now have to do things that I swore I’d never do. No, I’m not doing anything unethical. I just have to forget my squeamishness about some things and power through it. So far it hasn’t been too horrible LOL

February 2016 – I released the third and final book in my Southern Sin Series, Sinning to Win. I kept telling myself, and everyone else, that I was going to finish my sci-fi series. Mind you, I started that series while Dad was sick so I think part of my writer’s block has more to do with how I associate that story with the sorrow of losing him. Other ideas came to me while writing Sinning to Win and they were strong enough that I knew a new series of stories had to come from them.

March 2016 – I started working on my brand new series. The Band Nerd series is dear to my heart. Hello? I’m a band nerd and I would’ve adored having a guy like the heroes I’ve dreamed up falling in love with me. Who wouldn’t?

May 2016 – Steady, book 1 of the Band Nerd series came out.

Summer began and it was hot as balls. Just sayin’.

September 2016 – September 2nd to be exact, I put my sweet baby, Mia Isabella Von Hapsburg down. After fourteen and a half years of love, cuddles and puppy kisses, she went to wait for me at Rainbow Bridge. Letting her go was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But she was tired. As the vet said, Mia took good care of her people for a long time and deserved her rest. I still can’t help but get choked up when I think about her. I even dream about her, or expect to see her following me around the house.

I realize now, that Mia was a bridge for me. I got her only a couple of months after my stepdad died and lost her a year after my dad passed away. She helped me cope with two of the biggest losses I’ve experienced, and then I lost her too. It’s been an adjustment for us in the Avet house. My cat, who was raised with her, has become far more affectionate than she ever was before. She’s even sleeping with me. In the same spot Mia would sleep with me every night. I’ll admit to feeling lost without her. Hurrying to get home so I can let her out. Looking for her as I’m getting ready for work. *sigh* It’s been a rough month.

But the good thing about writing, is that sometimes we can channel that grief into a story.

I’m releasing the 2nd book in my Band Nerd series next week. Root comes out September 30th.

Now for upcoming news:

I’m feverishly working to finish Dasher’s story for the Reindeer Game series which I’m hoping will be released in December in time for Christmas. After that’s sent off for acceptance/rejection, I’ll finally put word to paper on Taming Hels, the third installment of the Caressed by Starlight serial. Yes, you read that right, I’m going to push those sci-fi stories out as soon as life allows me to. I’m not letting those characters boss me around anymore! Once those two books are out of my hands and with my editor, it’s back to the Band Nerds.

Also, I’m in the process of requesting rights backs from Ellora’s Cave. There will be some books re-released in 2017 with new covers and prices. Check back here, or at my website for more information. By the way, if you want to keep up with new releases, or re-releases, sign up for my newsletter!

That’s all I have for now. I’ll try to communicate more here in the future. I forgot how freeing it can be to just spew out whatever’s in my brain without worrying how many characters I’m using, or if FB is going to give me trouble for posting it.

Talk to y’all soon,
Danica

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You Have Questions, They Don’t Want to Answer

Well, I was about to say ‘we all ask questions that are so embarrassing we nearly kill the person we’re asking’, but I don’t know if everyone does this.

See, when I was a young, impressionable, innocent 16-year-old, I was reading romances so fast the local library was shipping them from other branches to keep up with me. I was innocent at this stage, I swear! However, I was curious. As romance readers know, our books include either sweet love scenes that make you go ‘aw’ and wonder what they’re doing behind that closed door, or they have hot, erotic scenes that have you putting the book down to fan your face.

Oh yes, I remember distinctly reading my very first steamy love scene. I was blushing so much, I put the book to the side, fanned myself, collected my tattered composure, and picked the book up again. I was hooked. Not because of the sex, which was outstanding, but because I’d never imagined such things! I really was innocent, I suppose, though it was a lack of knowing about passion more than the mechanics of the act.

So, armed with my newfound understanding of passion, I had to ask someone about pre-marital sex. I could’ve asked my older sister. She was married by that time with a couple of kids, but I just couldn’t do it. None of my friends had done the deed either, so I couldn’t ask them (hell, they were asking me about sex because of all the romances I read). So I went to the best source for information. My mom.

We were sitting in the kitchen. She was drinking coffee and I think it went something like this:

I plopped into a chair across from her. Fiddled with stuff on the table. Shook my leg nervously.

“Um, mom? Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

Deep breath. “Did you and dad have sex before you got married?”

I watched my mom’s face turn from her pretty olive tone to nearly puce. She stuttered. She stammered. Blinked at me in shock. “Ask your father!”

Hm. I was intrigued. Obviously, mom hadn’t waited before she was married, but I wanted to be sure. So when it was time to go to my dad’s house, I waited for the perfect moment to ask my question.

He just got in from work, was drinking his coffee (notice a coffee flavored theme here?). We chatted about how school was going and all the other boring stuff I didn’t want to talk about. Then…

“Dad? Did you and mom have sex before you got married?”

I watched my dad’s face, which was tanned dark from working outdoors all his life, turn brick red. He looked at me as though I’d lost my mind, but I was persistent. I wasn’t going to take the question back. I stared back at him.

He spluttered. Put his coffee cup down. Cleared his throat.

“Well, we did date for four years!”

And that was that. I finally knew the answer to my question. However, I’d just put my parents through what had to be the most embarrassing moment in their years of parenthood. Now, through the years, I’ve come across questions my friends and  younger cousins have asked their parents and nearly killed them with the shock.

Today’s question is: Did you ever ask someone a question that embarrassed them to the point of their imminent expiration? Have you ever been asked something that made you want to die right then and there?

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Slow Start

If you follow this blog, you may have noticed that I didn’t post anything yesterday. Yeah, I felt weird about not giving my daily two cents, but my mom had surgery, so that took precedent over anything else. I think the most I did yesterday was check my e-mail and even that was iffy.

What’s today’s blog going to be about? Well, considering I was taking care of mom yesterday, I think it should be about mothers. Now, my mom is something else. She likes to go around saying she’s a little old lady, but if anyone else even suggests such a thing, she gets offended. Maybe not ‘offended’ so much as it puts her back up.

She just turned 60 this year and (I guess this is where I should say that my sister, brother, and I love to torment her in a nice way) she wanted a party. I kept telling her that all she was getting was a cupcake with a candle on it. Meanwhile, we were covertly planning a birthday party. Yeah, we knew that was all she wanted, but we couldn’t let her know we were doing it! When her birthday came around, she had no clue about the party and we surprised her but good. She loved it. Of course, she said we were trying to kill her because we scared her. It isn’t true though.

She wasn’t a conventional mother, I guess. She wasn’t a mom who made breakfast for us every morning (we were lucky if she made breakfast once a month), she didn’t help us with our homework (she kept telling us that she wasn’t the one in school, we were and it was up to us to learn what we needed to), and she didn’t believe in things like senior trips (once we graduated from high school we were expected to go to work). However, she was always there when we got our hearts broken by something or other, she always made sure we spent time with our families, and she taught us to think for ourselves. She frequently gets frustrated with us because we’re all as hardheaded as she is and we won’t listen to every pearl of wisdom she hands out, so we have to remind her that she taught us to make our own mistakes, opinions, etc. and stick with them.

Do I think my mom is unique? Well, yeah! I think she’s amazing. A strong woman who’s spoiled rotten by her kids. Have I mentioned that if we don’t buy her soft drinks or sweets when she wants them, she pouts? Oh yes. She pouts. She likes to have her own way (who doesn’t) and isn’t above using guilt to get it, lol. Mom’s favorite sayings are ‘When I’m gone, you’re gonna remember this’ or ‘When I die…’.

So is it any surprise that when it was said she needed surgery, all of her kids took off of work to wake up at 3 in the morning to take her to the hospital? I don’t think so. Is it any surprise that we ignored her medicated ramblings? I don’t think so. She’s mom. We pick on her, we love her, we’d do anything for her. She’s my role model and my biggest fan (even though she DID say my business cards looked like I was writing porn).

Oh, don’t worry folks. I haven’t forgotten about the contest. I’m extending the first week in light of personal stuff going on, so any comments made beginning last week until this Sunday will be put in the drawing for a book.

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